Wal-Mart Parking Lot Puts Municipal Parking Lot Out Of Business:
AUBURN, ME—After serving the area for more than four decades, Parking Lot 2A lowered its moveable-arm gates for the last time Friday. The much-loved municipal parking lot is only the most recent casualty of Wal-Mart parking lots.A Wal-Mart Supercenter opened across from Lot 2A in October 2001.
Comprising 80 public and 45 rental stalls, the city-owned lot charged $3 a day during its prime. However, city engineers report that over the past five years, 2A’s clientele has steadily eroded, as more Auburn locals have opted for the convenience of the Wal-Mart lot.
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Wal-Mart officials had no comment on Lot 2A’s closure or whether unfair parking practices may have played a role in its demise.“It is not the policy of Wal-Mart to comment on the activities of other businesses,” Wal-Mart spokesman Olan James said. “We pride ourselves on our work with communities, and we hope that in time, people will come to embrace our parking lot as one of the family.”
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“unfair parking practices”
Woah, boy. Just wait till THAT one catches on.
The funny thing is that the reason WalMart has so many extra parking spaces is because of municipal parking minimum regulation. Ha ha!
“…we hope that in time, people will come to embrace our parking lot as one of the family.”
Does anyone else find that statement to be just a little bit ridiculous? It’s a PARKING LOT. It is not a family member, and should not be embraced as such.
It must be noted that theonion.com is a satirical site. A search of Google Nes reveals nothing about this “report”.
Meh, I didn’t read the source article, just the summary and commentary. The Onion is a great source for today’s ridiculous satire that will seem plausible tomorrow.
Can you imagine someone complaining about unfair parking practices, and possible government intervention to prevent that atrocity? I can.
LMAO!
Beautiful satire!
The satire is so spot-on that I didn’t peg it for satire until I ran across it at The Onion.
Of course, it helped that Mr. Swanson chose the most deadpan excerpts …
I have to admit that I would not have realized it was satire if I hadn’t clicked the link for the “news story” and saw that it was from The Onion.
Indeed, the exact same arguments are seriously advanced to attack WalMart’s low and lower price/s philosophy.
Google “wal-mart camping” to read about something that isn’t satire.Some campground owners are getting all wrapped around the axle over this.
I guess campground owners hate competition too, eh?
I didn’t notice it was an Onion story right away either. Of course, if it had been a “real” news story, the parking lot no doubt would have been a “mom-and-pop” owned lot.
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